North Korea: Kim Jong Un gets upset over the Lumberjack Song

(Pyongyang) North Korea has opined to the world that the US has hired a lumberjack (yes, you heard that right) in which to assassinate the dear leader (aka fat bastard nbr 1) by the use of a biochemical bomb. The Hermit Kingdom stated that the US had "ideologically corrupted" and bribed a North Korean surnamed Kim and turned him into "a terrorist full of repugnance and revenge against the supreme leadership."

"They hatched a plot of letting human scum Kim commit bomb terrorism targeting the supreme leadership during events at the Kumsusan Palace of the Sun and at military parade and public procession after his return home."

The CIA and the White House have declined to comment on the statement from North Korea's Ministry of State Security.

I wonder if Kim Jong Un is having nightmares after watching a ‘Monty Python’ VHS tape.